Tuesday, April 06, 2010

OUTRAGE! (58 points)

Well, it's official, the world's gone to hell in a handbasket: Mattel announced today that it's changing Scrabble rules for the first time since 1948 and now we can all use proper nouns...like common people! You can use Jay-Z, presumably without the hyphen, and Zeppo and ZZ Top, if you can magically cough up a second "Z."

This annoys me. First, I'm aggravated because I'm old and don't like change. The addition of new Crayola colors squirrels me up for months. Second, throughout my lazy childhood, I tried probably half a million times to convince susceptible opponents that throwing down the "M-A-R-X" tiles was a totally legitimate move. But because I played with a bunch of ninny rule readers, they shot me down every time. So now, two decades later, Mattel gets around to changing its rules to fit my needs. Thanks for nothing, Barbie-pushers! Too little, too late.

I'm hoping protests break out soon, and we'll all figure out some passive-aggressive way to protest this, like holding little bags of noisy tiles and rattling around behind Mattel executives until they break. Of course, the downside to launching a successful protest is that no one will ever be able to legally immortalize your success by using your name to crush an opponent.

D-A-M-N.

ETA: Or this might be some new urban legend. Oops. I'm still going to try and use it to my advantage wherever and whenever possible.

8 comments:

Jodie said...

That is just wrong.

Megan said...

http://www.slate.com/blogs/blogs/browbeat/archive/2010/04/06/don-t-panic-proper-nouns-will-not-be-allowed-in-scrabble.aspx

You needn't worry. This is going to be for a Scrabble-affiliated game. Not actual Scrabble. The link above has more information.

Dana Detrick-Clark from Serious Vanity Music said...

The fact that someone could actually triple word score with "Kardashian" makes the world seem like a dark, dark place.

Robinjsam said...

It's a new version being launched in the UK. Real, normal Scrabble isn't going anywhere. (I know, I panicked too when I first read it!)

jess (fushmush) said...

my husband and I were discussing this at lunch. There is just too much room to move when spelling names. For example Jessica could be (but shouldn't be) Jessika or Jessyka or Jezika.

Michelle said...

Oh, thank god. I thought something was weird when I read that it was "Mattel," knowing that Hasbro owns Scrabble over in the US, but I let indignation and panic take over instead of reading more.

The Modern Gal said...

I am so glad to read your update. My world would no doubt fall apart if proper nouns were allowed in Scrabble (something stupid people obviously don't have to worry about)

Frisco Squid said...

Yes, but think of all the points you can get for a properly placed capitol of Iceland! I might have to look up its correct spelling myself. Reykjavik? Is that right? Or can they only be English language proper names? Zamboni?