Thursday, March 29, 2007
Friday News Wrap-Up
* David Duchovny, why do you tease us so? Rumor has it that the last hurdles standing in the way of a second X Files movie have been cleared and production could start as early as 2008. For someone who has, on occasion, held drunken, one-sided conversations with her Mulder and Scully action figures, the news couldn’t be any better. Of course, we’ve heard movie rumors before so I refuse to get too excited until I’m actually sitting in the front row of my neighborhood cineplex, eating popcorn and staring up into the dark recesses of David’s mighty proboscis.
* Soon you will be able to strap an EEG onto your head and play video games with your brain. Thanks to a company called Emotiv Systems, I'll finally be able to play Minesweeper without the wear-and-tear of actually moving my limbs, which, let’s face it, are going to atrophy into useless flippers before human evolution’s all said and done. Here’s hoping the device comes with a catheter and a lifetime supply of Red Bull.
* If you'd prefer to steer clear of the EEG, you can always exercise those neurons with a free poem-a-day from those book-loving hippies at Poets.org in celebration of National Poetry Month this April. If you sign up, they'll send a poem from one of their new publications to your inbox every day, and they all will rhyme. Just kidding. It's probably free-form stuff that we all have to nod at thoughtfully and pretend to understand.
* Apropos of nothing, here’s a blog devoted to shoes and shoe faux pas, written in the voice of an effiminate, patronizingly accented gentleman who puts the word “the” in front of every noun, verb and adjective he can find. Is it supposed to be funny or not? I just don't know.
* Speaking of funny, here’s why I like the Internet: because I don’t have to watch all of Saturday Night Live anymore. If something funny happens, like Peyton Manning beating up little kids and teaching them to steal, I can just watch it online, thus saving me valuable time to learn how to play video games with my brain.
* And last but not least, tomorrow is My Political Boyfriend Al Gore's birthday. My girthsome Earth-prophet will be turning 59. In honor of the big day, I pledge (seriously) to walk, not drive, to all my errands, and also, if I get drunk, I might crank call Senator Inhofe and pretend I'm Barbara Boxer coming to steal his gavel. Dirty!
* ETA: I almost forgot this tidbit. Remember that contest at the Chicago Tribune I posted on a couple weeks back, where people could vote on their favorite TV character? Here are the shocking results: Battlestar Galactica's Starbuck smacked 24's Jack, 3,061 votes to 777 votes. Maybe it's because Kara knows how to use her inside voice, unlike Jack "I have a top-secret message but I'm going to shout it into this phone as loud as I can" Bauer. That's my theory.