“Strangely, even though I don’t dance, the team manager promised that I wouldn’t be the least talented wannabe there. I was probably the least tanned, though….”
“I pulled at my quads next to Christina Iannelli, who at 19 has already been a Philadelphia 76ers dancer, her abdomen smeared in body glitter and in a pink-sequined bra top. ‘I’m really nervous,’ she said. ‘I’m moving to New York City, and the only options are here or the Knicks.’ I asked whether the thick black hair spilling down her back would get in her way. ‘I think it’s an asset!’ she said. ‘I like getting all sexy with it.’ Hair in your mouth seems to be a crucial part of being a dancer, so I decided to leave my hair down, too.”
You've got to love the delicate nature of the sarcasm, so subtle and wispy that the young Jerseyites being mocked might miss it altogether, which hopefully means that Cohen will not get a fuschia nailfile shiv in the back anytime soon. Which also hopefully means she’ll be around to mock pageant participants and/or everyone who works at Abercrombie and Fitch. Fingers crossed!