10. People don't realize the Princess Leia metal bikini gets progressively more binding every Halloween we wear it.
9. All of the books we read means we'll likely be blind by the age of 40 and forced to listen to books on tape. Abridged books on tape. No one wants that.
8. Being socially awkward means we're ten times more likely than the average woman to spontaneously fall down in front of attractive men.
7. Carrying these enormous brains on top of our delicate, Audrey Hepburn-like necks gives us backaches, like, every day.
6. Because we're women, we have a genetic imperative to shop. Because we're nerdy women, we have a genetic imperative to fear the clothes we crave. It's a Catch-22 never envisioned by Joseph Heller. If he had, Yossarian would have worn more accessories.
5. We've watched every episode of Star Trek. We know futuristic space travel. Yet, for a lack of advanced degrees, we fear NASA will never give us a shot at driving the space shuttle. Or maybe the word is "pilot." Whatever.
4. When we're out on dates and our significant other misquotes the 17th digit of pi but we really, really want to get lucky, we have to ignore their egregious error and just cry a little inside.
3. NASCAR is a wound that will never heal.
2. English and/or Irish accents render us incapable of clear thinking, explaining our ill-advised crushes on Phil Collins, Wilkie Collins, Joan Collins and one or two other Collinses we'd rather not discuss.
1. We know that nerds are the future. It's just a bitch waiting for everyone else to catch up.